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Today I’m writing to share with you how I move to a new town and pickup women. In this post I’ll share with you the story of how I picked up a woman who worked as a bar back and had a one-night stand with her.

I will first share the story and all the steps I took to make this happen. Then I will explain you the reasons behind the choices I made.

How I Picked Up A Bartender Using Social Circle Dating

A couple years back I moved to San Diego. (I have changed the names and places to protect the identity of the women involved.)

I moved into an apartment downtown. I then looked for a bar nearby that I could go to on a regular basis, and start meeting people and making friends.

I found a bar nearby which had more lounge type of environment. I prefer to go to lounges as opposed to loud bars or dance clubs.

On the first night out, I went there and made some friends.

I became friends with a woman named Ashley, and we spent most of the night talking together. Ashley is an average looking woman but has a great energy and a fun spirit.

I also chatted a bit with the bartenders and the bouncer, as they are important people to get to know.

Once the friendship was established, we made plans to get together the next day, and I felt there wasn’t a need (at this time) to get her phone number.

This bar had very pretty bar backs working there. I was especially attracted to one named Natalie.

I went back the next day with my new friend Ashley. We decided to go there early to avoid the later crowd.

We sat at the bar and started talking. I soon steered the conversation to Ashley’s love life. I found out she was single, and then tried to steer the conversation in the sexual direction even though Ashley is not my target.

Natalie was my target.

I wanted to bring the topic of sex up as soon as possible to get the attention of Natalie, the bar back. This is also why I chose to sit by the bar as opposed to the seating areas.

I found out Ashley had just returned from a vacation, so I asked her how many one-night stands she had when she went on the vacation.

She laughed and said none.

To this I replied, in a voice loud enough for Natalie to hear, “What kind of a sick human being goes on a vacation and comes back without getting laid? You are a disgrace to singles everywhere!” But, I said this in a very funny way so it would be obvious that I was kidding.

Natalie was walking back and forth throughout my conversation with Ashley, so I know she heard everything.

And even though I could tell that she wanted to chime in, she continued to walk back and forth and did not join us.

I could have easily gotten her involved at any moment, but I personally like to go slow in Social Circle Game. For me, that’s just my personality.

While I was talking to Ashley I hugged her a few times, held her hand, kissed her on the cheeks a few times and talked about sex and relationships.

I was clearly demonstrating strong kino, establishing myself as a touchy guy, while simultaneously building comfort with Ashley.

We both had high energy, so any onlooker could tell we were having a good time.

We said our goodbyes and ended the night.

The next night, I returned to the same venue at least 10 minutes earlier than I was supposed to meet up with Ashley. Again, I went there early in the evening before the crowd came in.

Natalie came over and offered me the drink menu. She asked me where my friend was and I told her I was early but she would be here in few minutes.

I said, “I hope we were not too crazy last night.” She said, “No I loved what you guys were talking about. I wanted to join in but did not want to interfere.”

I instantly grabbed her and gave her a noogie saying, “Silly you don’t have to stay away! We’re all friends here. And if I need a beer from you I’ll even butt into the middle of you having sex! Clearly, I’m socially awkward. As you saw last night.”

I went on to say that I’m new in town and had only just become friends with Ashley just the other day. “I like this place. It has a cool crowd, and obviously I need to make a new friends, so don’t hesitate to butt in next time!”

When Ashley arrived, she brought along another female friend.

We continued the night and I maintained the same fun energy as the previous night, and I kept my jokes around sex and relationships.

I also continued with my kino.

Natalie joined the conversation a few times. Natalie and I also continued to make eye contact, so I knew what I did last night had totally worked. I knew I had her attention it was now time to solidify that attraction.

While all of this was going on, I flirted with Ashley’s friend, Paige. Paige was average looking, but that didn’t matter. I just wanted to make Natalie jealous.

I teased Natalie a few times, stuck out my tongue to her, and called her funny names.

I ended the night by leaving with both Paige and Ashley.

A couple days later I went back to the bar by myself.

Natalie came over to talk, and I told her this night I was going to drink by myself and maybe make new friends.

I had couple of drinks and Natalie kept coming back to keep me company. I confessed to Natalie that I felt horrible as I ended up sleeping with Ashley’s friend the other night.

She replied, “I knew you would.” But she asked me why I felt bad.

I explained that I was friends with Ashley, and I knew that Ashley had not had sex in a while. And I’m sure she must have felt bad that I had sex with her friend instead, and she didn’t get to have sex.

Natalie replied, “I know what you are saying. But don’t feel bad. I’ve done the same thing in the past.”

At this point, I knew this was the moment.

I turned to her and said, “Thanks for making me feel good. You’re pretty cool. When is your day off? We should grab a drink or something.”

She said she’d like that and we exchanged numbers. She also told me when her next day off would be, which was in 3 days.

I went back to the bar 2 days later, the day before her day off, and I went there with Ashley.

Natalie came over to chat a couple times, and I didn’t bring up the topic of us meeting on her day off. However, Natalie asked, and I replied, “Yah, I’ll text you and we’ll make plans.”

The next day I texted her, but she didn’t reply.

A couple days later I went to the bar by myself. I knew things could be awkward if I didn’t handle it just right.

As soon as I saw her I teased her and called her a flake in really loud voice. She came over and made some lame excuse and apologized to me.

I told her it was all good and that it really didn’t matter, but she asked me if I wanted to come to her place for dinner on her next day off.

From experience I knew this wouldn’t happen even if I said yes…it was too soon.

So, I replied, “Let’s talk close to your day off. And I’m not sure if I want to put myself through your cooking.” She laughed.

On this night I took my flirting with the other bartenders up a notch. I still flirted with Natalie, as I didn’t want her to think she was being punished for being a flake. Instead I wanted her to know that I have choices.

The weekend came and I didn’t hear from Natalie. It was 7pm on Friday, and I had already made plans to go out with another woman.

As I’m leaving, I got a text from Natalie asking if I wanted to meet up for drinks.

I told her I was with a friend and wouldn’t be able to meet up until around 10.30.

She said cool, so around 10:30 we finally met up.

We had few drinks and some super emotionally-charged conversation. We started kissing shortly after, and soon left the bar for my place.

I don’t have to tell you what happened then.

Social Circle Game techniques I applied

Here is the stuff you need to understand. On the surface it might seem like not much happened here but I controlled the dynamics on several occasions to make everything fall into place.

  • I started by making a friend. I didn’t care what she looked like, I simply wanted someone who would be fun and had time to come out on a regular basis. Remember I was in new town, so I had to start somewhere. Yes, I could have approached a woman directly but why do that when you can get women without approaching them???
  • Next, I realized that the woman I was attracted to is probably hit on every single night by many different types of men. So, if I tried a direct approach, I would be like any other guy on any other night. I wanted to reverse this. I wanted this woman to feel attraction for me before I made my move.
  • My conversation with Ashley centered around sex and relationships because I wanted to convey to Natalie that other women like to talk about sex and relationships with me. THIS IS VERY POWERFUL. When a woman sees that other women talk about sex and relationships with you, they know that women like you and want to have sex with you. This is like a secret code. Women just know that any man who talks relationship and sex in this manner has to be popular with women.
  • Next, I flirted with all the bartenders and I got physical with Ashley. Even though we were not sexual, I was holding her hands, kissing her on the cheeks and hugging her. This was enough to reinforce that women are comfortable getting physical with me. Additionally, the talking, flirting and giving compliments to the bartenders and other bar backs was a way to grow my popularity so they talk about me behind my back. All of this, again, to build my value.
  • By mentioning to Natalie that I was new in town and saying “we all are friends” was a smooth way of clueing her into the fact that I am in the process of building relationships. This was to plant the idea that I am single, available, and looking.
  • I flirted with Ashley’s friend (Paige) and got sexual with them both. This was done to make Natalie jealous and to demonstrate that other women are lining up to be with me. At the same time, I was making eye contact and teasing Natalie. This was a strong signal to Natalie to let her know that I liked her but that someone else had gotten closer to me that night.
  • I mentioned to Natalie that I slept with Ashley’s friend. This was another one of those secret language things. Men who are very sexual and often sleep with women usually get tangled in the wrong sexual affairs. By saying I had fucked up, I clued her again that I am a very sexual guy and women sleep with me all the time.

After all of this, Natalie saw that I was a popular man with women and that women like my company.

I was popular with her co-workers and I was different from the men she meets on a regular basis. All I had to do now was to close the deal.


In this situation I was not looking for a relationship.

Yes, I could have run a faster game and yes, I could have flirted differently.

But this is my style.

I usually meet women and flirt with them.

I make this part of my lifestyle so I have 3-4 different women at the same time.

I do not make an effort to go out and hunt women. I simply do things I enjoy, and in the process I keep taking the next steps.

I didn’t go to this bar night after night to see Natalie. Instead, I went out for drinks with a friend, and this just happened to be where Natalie was.

She didn’t feel like I was being a creep, and seduction happened naturally because I had established myself to be a social (and sexual) guy.

When this becomes your nature it feels effortless to seduce women.

Upon meeting Natalie I realized that she was used to being hit on by a lot of men, which is why I built my value so high.

If I wanted to have relationship with her I probably would have talked more about relationships than sex with Ashley.

I also would have talked about being a “relationship guy” when I talked about sleeping with Ashley’s friend.

Basically, I would have let her know that I was looking for a steady relationship. I could have even talked about my previous long-term relationships.

I am still in touch with Natalie and we occasionally see each other when I am in town.

I hope this gives you a good idea on how I meet women and use the principals of Social Circle Game to date them.


If you want to master the techniques of Social Circle Game, and be able to pickup women within your everyday activities then watch the Magic’s DVDs on Social Circle Game. These DVDs have all the information you need to build a lifestyle full of high quality women.

Social Circle Game is very effective in eliminating the need to go to the bars to pickup women. It also helps with overcoming approach anxiety.

Our Pickup Artist style workshops are another option to help build these skills. On day three of our workshop we help you with a personalized Social Circle Game Plan.

We help you design a plan to pickup women at work, school, activities, or parties that you attend as a daily part of your life.

We help you understand the dynamics of the places you visit, and help you understand the dynamics of these environments as they relate to meetings and picking up women.

I hope you find this helpful!