One of the most important things, if not the most important is your belief system…. aka ( Dating Confidence)
“There is a well known affect of hypnosis that really shows how powerful the mind can be in creating a physical response based on THOUGHT. A person who is hypnotized can be told that they are going to feel a hot coal placed on their leg. An ice cube is placed on the leg and the brain has difficulty distinguishing this feeling from the intense heat of what it thinks is a hot coal. Now, the really exciting part is that in many cases, the skin will actually react just as a burned area of skin would, creating a blister and filling with fluid. If our minds are this powerful, and respond with such a dramatic change in the physiology with only a THOUGHT, imagine the possibilities.” Friesen Ph.D
My point is that your personal belief system is whats holding you back from becoming that sexy guy that all women are attracted to. You’ve seen them infield,they have a name…”Naturals”. The majority of you guys that I have talked to, out-infield and during workshops, have told me what you really want, that deep down inside you want women to want YOU. You want them to come to you, to have them walk up to you and just hand over their phone number, with one sexy look from you and they just melt. You want to just walk into a room and have all of them look your way because of your energy, confidence, and presence your projecting. Not one has yet to tell me that they want learn how to CHASE women. You want to be the confident guy that women just want to chase and F*. Because women do chase… Bad Boys..Naturals… etc.
How you feel about yourself, how you see yourself in the mirror, and how you believe others see you is what your projecting to the world and to women. You create your own environment. Now ask yourself, If your personal beliefs about yourself is what you’re projecting to the world, do you believe the energy you are projecting is attractive to women? to the point where they will come up to you and just start talking to you with the hopes of you asking them out or the possibility that they will outright initiate a positive response to get your attention?
Think back as far back as you can to when you were a little kid, all the negative thoughts that have crossed your mind, what your so-posed friends have said about you… by putting you down, making fun of you, passing rumors, telling jokes, how did that make you feel? How much of that are you caring around with you to this day?. What are your personal thoughts about women? How do they feel about you? How do you really feel about them? Do you love them? Do you blame them? Accumulate all those negative thoughts you are caring around in your belief system for so many years into a box, how big is that box? Can you imagine it? Is it the size of a shoe box? or the size of a house? How big would that box have to be to hold over 20+ years of negative thoughts that have been compounding year after year? The size of that box is your personal belief about yourself, how your mind and thoughts feel about you and your worthiness compared to others. Throw that out the window and start to think positive. Start to believe in yourself and gain some important dating confidence.
Comment: Great post. Now what? Yes, beliefs are powerful, but give us a step by step process of BEING that guy. A lot of gurus out there are giving you stuff to DO, not BE. The hope is that over time by DOING THINGS you gain the confidence to talk and date women. — B.
Their lye’s the problem… “hope”, there is no certainty in “hope”. We as guys are very logical, we need a step by step process to solve a problem. You see it as a problem, like a problem that needs to be repaired, are you really broken? I don’t believe anyone is broken, maybe misguided by our egos and guru’s.
I can say and do things that can make a powerful shift in your belief system, the problem is that you will first compare what I tell you with all the audio, video, friends, community guys, gurus have told you, heard or seen. Your brain (machine-computer) will then compare it to everything you believe to know to be true. Your brain will then decide if there is a correlation between what I’ve said and what you believe to know or to be true, you may then decide to try it with the “hope” that it will work. If it doesn’t sound like it makes sense or no one else is talking about it (not main stream) or its not in your brain housing group/memory, you will just set it aside and move on in search of something that does make sense to your brain (computer files) with the “hope” that it will fix whatever your brain believes to be the problem.
Actually, I do believe I have, I have mentioned it here and there on some of my posts, but its not mainstream, its not a community thing because there are no real step by step process and its not an overnight fix so its not being sold by others or researched. And nothing is ever easy or QUICK. But once you own it, its stays with you forever. Because you are being your Authentic true self. Those of you that have met me, know that I have a very powerful frame and confidence about myself.
The reason average guys don’t believe they can have the “Selector” belief frame is because there is no way to prove to your brain that its true, its something that can’t be held or grasped. There is nothing to compare it to, to show progress, their is no PROOF that what your trying to make your mind believe is really true. The mind needs to see it, to believe it, or so that’s what it believes, what ever you allow it to believe. And like anything else, no one will really try something unless they have all the information they can get their hands on before they can commence to believe in it. That’s why we all try to get our hands on every piece material that is out there, we won’t try something until we fully believe we know everything there is to know before we “jump in”, we want assurity that there is little to no chance of failure. How many of you go out at night to see other PUA’s in field, doing demo’s? You’ve read their successful field reports, why do you still have the need to see it? because you still believe you have to see it, to believe it.
Control your mind, change your beliefs.
Start off with this: Get in front of a mirror. Get a piece of paper. Write down how you feel about yourself when you look in the mirror. Write down what you believe your mind sees, what your mind believes other people see when they see you. What girls see, when they see you.
Don’t B.S. yourself. Be honest.
Then, write it again with everything being positive, see it, hear it.
How does that make you feel?
I also highly recommend reading Social Mastery Book And doing the exercises at the end of first three chapters. They are very effective. A leading New York psychotherapist Jed Turnbull said this about the book: “Excellent! Monumental! Very Nicely Done!” That should tell you how good the book is.
In Closing, your belief system goes deeper into your subconscious. At the surface level(iceberg)..conscious, you make decisions based on how you currently view the world. The problem is your just unaware of how powerful your subconscious mind really is and how it really affects your way of thinking and viewing things. Focus on changing your subconscious minds beliefs, by changing the way you feel about yourself and gain the confidence to go out and date.
